people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
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