i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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