Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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