Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
