Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Randomize
