This dress was meant to end up on your floor
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
