I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
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