He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Randomize
