I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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