we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
