u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
