You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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