Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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