Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
