is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
