Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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