he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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