two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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