there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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