I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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