Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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