so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
