talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
