Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
