I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.