Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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