I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize
