Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
