make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
