its not stalking. its research.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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