I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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