Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
if you like me you must not know who I am
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Randomize
