Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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