yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Randomize
