The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Randomize