a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
