Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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