You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
