I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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