and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Randomize
