Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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