I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
