I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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