I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
