Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
