look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize