Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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