he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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