You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize