We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
